This post is in two parts
In my journey to prepare myself to be a good man and a great husband, I learned this awesome nugget of truth. While most people spend MONTHS preparing for the wedding, they may only spend a few days preparing for their lives together.
Think about it. Lots of money and time and energy spent on preparing for one day. How much effort spent on preparing on a life together?
That really hit me. And I’ve had a lot of time to think that through (I’ve been single for a LONG time). What we need to do is prepare for a life with someone.
That means going through a long list of issues that can come up. For example…
- How will you guys handle money?
- What do you expect from sex?
- What will you do when you argue?
- What if someone cheats, will there be forgiveness?
- What things do you expect from each other?
- What does each person need, what do they want (needs and wants are very different things)?
- If the romance runs out after a few years, will you give up, or will you get help and restart the fire?
- What life goals do each of you have?
- Do you want kids? How many? How do you plan to raise them? What values do you want them to have?
- Are you equally yoked in your faith? Do you want the same things and are you willing to give up the same things?
These are just a few questions that people who plan to get married should sit down and talk through.
It’s much easier to fix problems BEFORE getting married than fix them AFTER getting married!
Please check out the follow-on post to this one: The power and purpose of manhood (and women)