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Men and women

Women see potential, men need challenges

I’ve heard time and again that women want men who smell nice and have clean teeth. But you know, every time I hear that, it’s told by a women who has been with a man who DOESN’T smell nice and have clean teeth.

Funny thing… she went out with a man who wasn’t what she wanted. Why is that? It’s because women see the best in people. They see the potential.

4Ɨ4truck.jpgA man is programmed to focus, to drive at something, to think about one thing at a time. We’re like a very powerful 4×4 vehicle. WE CAN do stuff… but for some reason we simply don’t.

So if we don’t have a challenge, we sit in front of the tv and watch other men compete and overcome!

Many women want to be a mom because it’s a wonderful way to fully express her skills. Where else can she totally BE all she can be? But where is that same thing for men?

She’s designed by God to think about 10 things at once, she’s designed to talk to you and know where the kids are, what time it is and what’s next… and who has had a bath and who needs one and who has not eaten enough at lunch and will need extra at dinner.

That’s why women make great managers – they can keep track of multiple priorities. That’s why women make great air hostesses – they can monitor the happiness of 20 or 200 people.
And for men? In the days when people were setting up farms in hostile territory, a man was incredible useful. But now… you don’t need a man to protect you, just dial 911. You don’t need a man to program the video recorder, because the darn thing does it itself. Hire someone to do the lawn.

What do people need men for? Society has made everything easy. There are no challenges left for us men. We’ve done such a good job at killing the animals that were dangerous to our families… that there are no more animals left in the wild and our families sleep behind fences and walls and security alarms.

We’re out of a job! So we watch tv. Or some men channel their testosterone into anger or games or violence. All of the people on death row are men. Most of the prisoners in prisons are men. We’re different, because we have testosterone in our blood.

Little boys play differently to little girls. Have you noticed? Don’t tell boys to sit still like girls do. Don’t tell them to not explore the world. Don’t limit their imagination. Don’t crush their spirit.

If you train a young boy to NOT challenge limits, you’re building an effeminate man who will not be able to lead a family or protect a nation. Instead, set your son free to challenge limits, to do things that are dangerous, to break stuff apart and see what’s inside. That young boy will go on to be a man who breaks new ground for the Kingdom of God.

We men are built for something… but that something is harder and harder to find these days.

A man needs to build and chase and fight. I never used to think that was true… but as I healed and became more me… I discovered women… and I discovered I can never EVER think like they do.

I discovered that a female is astonishingly different… and astonishingly good at relational things. I don’t think like she does. I don’t feel the way she does. I can’t keep up with her in a battle of wits. I’m also not as cruel mentally and not as vicious verbally. (A generalization of course)

So I realized I needed to figure out what I am good at. So I tried my hand at various things. I tried building. Yeah I’m good at rotating 3D images in my head. I tried going outdoors, yeah I like that – especially when it’s a long long trek in mountainous terrains where I get frightened that I may fall to my death. Good stuff.

So over time I realized… I’m not a woman… and any woman is not at all like me.

I’m built to do one thing at a time. I don’t need to talk a lot. I don’t need to get permission. I don’t need approval. I don’t need to dress well. I want a challenge. I want to die having made a difference in the world.

So we men… we have to find a challenge. If we find one (that suits our personality and our character) we will be happy and prosper.

But if we don’t, we’ll sit in front of the TV and watch other men challenging themselves and fighting and overcoming. We can either do it or watch it… either way we will be involved in it.

Did I say that there are no new territories for men to break open? Well, in fact there are. Here are some

  • Most of the world lives in poverty – build a movement to destroy this enemy of Jesus
  • Most of the promises of power and overcoming in the bible are not actually happening – start praying that Jesus will show you how to live the way Jesus did
  • Men right around the world are passive. Alcoholism is rampant in men throughout Russia and that means that women have to do everything there – ask Jesus how you can make a difference
  • Sexual abuse of boys and girls affects a third of the kids in society at least – what can Jesus do through you do to turn back this tide?

Look around your life for challenges. You’re built for a challenge. It’s when you make sense to yourself and those around you.


About Mark Wilson

I am a prayer missionary. Please subscribe, consider donating to support this ministry, leave a comment and stay in touch via FB or Twitter. God bless you :)


10 thoughts on “Women see potential, men need challenges

  1. Yes, we are so very different. And I am glad someone like you points it out so well. I took time later in life to find myself and go exploring. Well worth the time and effort.

    Posted by Joe | June 6, 2007, 8:58 am
  2. Well said!

    Posted by John M. Kenney | June 7, 2007, 8:56 am
  3. Amazing post. You’ve really captured the inner struggle of men. Thank you for being so candid!

    Posted by Bob Speakman | June 11, 2007, 7:59 pm
  4. thank you.

    Posted by sam | June 16, 2007, 8:17 am
  5. Oooh my God,great stuff and to the point and relevant,even after 10 months!! Ooo my God, we muist be truthful about our selves.Thank u a Zillion!

    Posted by Elijah Samuel. | April 17, 2008, 12:46 pm
  6. I don’t agree with the effeminate man part, because a sheltered boy will eventually have to go to high school, and the boy will probably get picked on…

    then he has two choices

    1. Step up his game, and become the alpha male


    2. Be a victim

    Posted by Responsible Blogging at its Finest (Gnarfard) | October 12, 2008, 5:54 pm
  7. I was looking up articles on men and tv. Sometimes women can be pointing a finger with three pointing back and not even realize it. I really appreciated a lot of the points brought out because you can’t deny the fact that God made men and women different and we all know that even women don’t get along with women at times, and the same for men. But this helped me to be patient with my husband and pray for him. He is a great guy and has accomplished a lot. We are definitely very different, but I married him because I wanted to be his helpmeet, not his controller. I made the choice to marry him and this is what others have done as well. It was a choice, based on God’s standards and principles. If we are fair, and believe that God is good and made us the way He wanted, then we should accept the challenges that are in marriage and do what’s right. This involves humility, forgiveness, and forgetting self, which truly brings fullness of joy and this is what Christ wants to give us. A controlling person gets irritated when others don’t fit into their schedule. This is a real challenge in marriage, but well worth the battle to “love your neighbor”, beginning with your husband and family. God’s ways are always best.

    Posted by myonehoney | February 23, 2009, 6:17 pm
  8. I haven’t been feeling myself lately and have been trying to figure out why and started thinking about my nature and how I feel I have no challenges right now so I google “men need challenges” and came across this article and it reaffirmed my thoughts. Now I just need to ask God for some suitable challenges…

    Posted by Phil | June 17, 2009, 9:13 pm

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